Jokes

Police arrested a drunkard & asked: Where r u going?
Man: I'm going 2 listen lecture on ill effects of drinking.
Cop: Who'll lecture at midnight? Man: My wife...
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Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business? Student: Father-in-Law!
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Man: Is there any way for a long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.
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Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!
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Wats the diff between Complete & Finished?
If you find a good wife u r complete otherwise u r finished
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So many options: Poison, sleeping pills, hanging, jumping from a building, lying on train tracks, but
we chose Marriage, slow and sure!
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Have u heard about the man who threw his wife into a pond of crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the animal rights for being cruel to the crocodiles.
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Two men r talking.
1st: I got married coz I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house, doing the laundry & wearing shabby clothes.
2nd: Amazing, I just got divorced for the very same reasons
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